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I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! #384870 09/19/09 05:58 AM
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winniee2009 Offline OP
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I feel so lost today & I just need some thoughts on my situation. I’m 25 & I’ve been going to college since right after HS. I never really had any problems with my grades (in fact, I was mostly an A student throughout the years) - but I just don’t have a true passion in majoring any particular career. So while running out of time to come up with something, I picked social work thinking that it was most suitable with my personality (introvert, patient, caring, understanding, etc.). However, that didn’t turn out very well (I had almost zero interest in studying the subject) so I decided to change my major to a medical field career. The program is 2 years & I’m ½ way done now. Comparing to my previous major, I enjoyed what I study quite more than before – though I encountered tremendous stress & challenges for training in the hospital. While people can learn & work just as well in emergency/fast pace situations, I just face so much difficulty. Especially I’m a little too passive, slow, and nervous so I just keep messing little stuff. Today I feel like I’m having a nervous breakdown, mentally & physically I’m feeling beyond exhausted & ill. I’ve put in so much energy, money & time into this career so I really don’t want to give it up yet. I’m 25 already & I can’t afford to go from major to major anymore. But at the same time, it’s getting so unbearable & stressful that everyday waking up feels like hell to me….I’ve been depressed since my late teens, but not as nearly as I am now. I truly want a decent career to support my parents & my life later on, but I feel like I’m literally...killing myself slowly at the same time also Please share your thoughts on my situation!!! Have you had any similar issue before & how did you resolve it? Is life this stressful & depressing to many of you also? I never really have any passion in anything I do in life, so could this be a factor contributing to my "failure" in my career choice? Sorry this is longer than I thought...

Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: winniee2009] #384880 09/19/09 04:42 PM
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my best advice would be to just calm down, relax, take one small thing at a time, dont focus on the big tasks, focus on the small tasks that lead up to it, one day at a time.

if you feel you honestly can not do this career then change it, there is no age limit on studying and changing yourself smile since you are this far through it, maybe its best to finish it and do this as a career for a year and truly see if you enjoy it or not, make some money and then decide what you really want.

possibly take an aptitude test, any college advisor can get you in touch with the test, it asks a ton of questions and at the end it tells you what career field would be best for you, mine was dead on, it gives you like 3-5 different options.

but for now, relax, one thing at a time.

Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: ] #384881 09/19/09 05:20 PM
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Gustafson Offline
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Not having background knowledge of you, I'll tell you what I would do. I would take a semester off. Use that time to decompress, and do a little soul searching. What do you like to do in your spare time. What's something you can do as a pick me up? I think knowing yourself will go a long way for decided your life's path.

I love blood and guts. I love the human body, even in my spare time I watch medical shows, so I'm going into hospital work. Helwa and another member love animals, they're going into veterinary work. Once you find out what makes a little spark go off in you, nothing can stop you.

Also, talking to someone may help. Whether it's a psychologist, a guidance counselor or someone you're close to, often times an outside view can help shed some light on you.

Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: Gustafson] #384898 09/19/09 08:59 PM
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try to stay calm and focused, in the things you are taking... one will branch to something you'll love and may not even have thought of yet.
i will be 41 this year. all my life, i had no clue about who i was or wanted to be. i have always enjoyed the company of seniors, took a job in a senior care center was absolutely TERRIFIED as i had been in retail my whole life.(even owned a hunting and fishing supply shop) i have always enjoyed people and giving good service and especially, making people smile.
after working that job,(something that had NEVER even come to my mind as a direction to go in...) i decided to go back to school this semester to become a licensed practical nurse. smile
i am 41, have been out of school for 25 yrs and have found what i want to do. i will be working with people, helping them, (hopefully) making them smile but not as a health care aid, but as someone who has the opportunity to get to know them, not just dress and change them. it contains all of the things i have already found as things i want to do AND incorporates many other thins i have interest in as well, without realizing it. i had always thought i was going to have something to do with hunting, fishing etc... or in a craft/floral capacity. being an LPN is as far on the other end of the scale as you can get!!
something will show up, sit for some quiet time one night and think "outside the box". the bigger box containing all you have to offer will have a medium sized box inside it with multiple choices in it. you just have to break down one of the walls of the little box that is holding you in, right now! you will find it, you obviously have what it takes according to your drive... perhaps just drive down a few different roads in your mind and see where they may take you, you may be VERY surprised where you decide to stop!!
good luck, keep your chin up, otherwise, you may trip on your tongue!! LOL smile

Last edited by baby blue; 09/19/09 09:00 PM.

baby blue
Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: baby blue] #384909 09/19/09 11:27 PM
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Hello winniee2009 smile

I agree with Helwa, Gustafson & Baby Blue.

Also, it sounds as if you are suffering from panic attacks ~ and you say that you also have depression.

You need to try to sort those out.
Can you see a doctor and / or a counsellor?

Just talking things over can help.
Do you have a college tutor or mentor, or someone reliable, who you can turn to, just to chat ~ you know what they say: a problem shared is a problem halved.

Is there anything else going on in your life that has brought this to a head?

Do you eat well & get enough quality sleep?

Maybe you have just been studying for too long, without a break, so I agree that it might be a good idea to take some time off, if you can.

You would then be able to improve your health and have a think about what your true ambitions are.

Maybe you ~ or others ~ are putting too much pressure on you. You worry about supporting your parents ~ is this a problem, then?

Where do you live?
Do you have many friends and / or a husband, partner or boyfriend?
Do you give yourself time to unwind, to rest & enjoy yourself, as well as study?

I love studying and I went to a very academic school, where I was very happy and I worked very hard, but I remember finding it very difficult to settle down to studying a new course immediately after exams. And I didn't go back to my studies ~ at university ~ until I was 26. I got my degree at 28 and my post grad teaching certificate at 29. I gained another ~ adult ed ~ teaching qualification in 2001.

Since then I have taken more courses. I am now in my 50s and am deciding what to study next.

Learning is a life-long pursuit, so there is no need to burn yourself out at 25 smile.

Take care & good luck! smile


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: PDM] #384919 09/20/09 02:54 AM
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panic attacks are very scary... i used to have them bad enough the blood vessels in my face and neck would burst from my blood pressure going up too fast. they are a neon sign that you need to go to the doc and get him to help you get things straightened out so you can get back on track. depression is very insidious. it happens and you don't know it is happening until you end up suddenly in the hospital after doing something that would never have occurred to you if you were well. depression is a treatable disease that you don't have to suffer every day in misery. i have major depressive episodes, the last left me in the hospital for 6 weeks. (luckily i am still here and have learned alot) see your doc, get hold of it before it gets hold of you sweetie. it can be managed and managed well, but you should go and get someone to give you some options. the world really is wonderful. full of stress but wonderful. (i am very lucky that i was here to see the birth of my first grandchild) please don't wait, the is nothing wrong with seeking help if you need it. take care of yourself hon, "you are a child of the universe...no less than the moon and the stars". (((HUGS)))


baby blue
Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: baby blue] #384925 09/20/09 07:06 AM
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winniee2009 Offline OP
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Thank you so much for your replies, your words really give me an encouragement...I guess it’s just so many things happen altogether that drive me insane. In the hospital, I have constant pressure to do well, to make as little mistakes as possible...so the more pressure I have, the less efficiency I can perform the task. I feel like my personality is not suitable with this rapid pace, I get nervous TOO easily. I’ve made quite a few mistakes & it makes me feel like a...loser sometimes (I could sense it from a few staffs). But of course, I never stopped trying regardless It was so stressful in the beginning that I started to have severe shortness of breaths constantly. The doctor couldn’t find anything after running several tests so she told me I could be suffering from anxiety attacks from school (which never happened before)..They didn’t prescribe me anything, but honestly, I'm not a big fan of drugs either...I had a really bad reaction once & it really scared me. My parents have been supporting me through school all these years – well I take care of the school-related & personal expenses but I still live with my parents & my older sister (that’s normal in our culture – until you get married). However, I feel guilty for not being able to help them out much at this age you know. They’re not rushing me or having any financial difficulty - but I just feel like it’s my responsibility to take care of this kind of stuff now... Back when I just got into college, I took the personality test several times and social work was among the choices that came up....but unfortunately that didn’t work out quite well. I don’t know, maybe I lack the energy in life, nothing really excites me much so I can’t stick with anything for very long. I have only 1 friend, but she’s working like crazy too & I’m stuck with school so we hardly see each other. After school & hospital training, I just come straight home with my family...mostly I just study & study, help around the house, play with my birds, enjoy the flower garden, go eat once in a while...and that’s pretty much it, day after day including weekends. I’ve been talking to my family about my problem & they’ve been very understanding. My dad suggests maybe I could start doing Yoga/meditation again (I used to practice that when I was younger), so probably it could help relax my mind a bit...I don’t know, I guess I’d just keep trying, taking things one at a time & see where it takes me...

Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: winniee2009] #384941 09/20/09 05:02 PM
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I am also training for a job in the medical profession. I can completely understand your stress and anxiety in this field. During my first 2 years of professional school I was very stressed and now that I look back on it, I believe that I was depressed. Going from undergrad to professional school, especially medical professional school where you are responsible for lives. My solution was to go speak with the counselor at my medical school. The counselors there work with people in similar situations as you all the time, so they've dealt with it all before. He helped me figure out where my stress, anxiety, and depression where coming from and helped me figure out solutions to the problems. I came out of it a much stronger and calm person. I am much happier now, and even though what I'm doing in school now is still stressful and lives are in my hands daily I am able to redirect the stress into a more positive direction.

Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: animalfriend] #384950 09/20/09 06:35 PM
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This is just a response from my personal experience, but have you thought of taking some University courses rather than college? (or if you are referring to american "college" then have you tried 'community college?') I graduated from college last year but I found that it was absolutely not challenging enough and that I wanted something more for myself, so I enrolled in University. This is much more my pace, and I find that it is more independant than college so you are able to manage your time as you see fit.

Just a thought smile good luck!


Re: I'm having a nervous breakdown in school!!! [Re: BijousMom85] #384961 09/20/09 08:23 PM
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baby blue Offline
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i hope that you are feeling better today hon,
keep talking to us, we may not be pros but we can be a unique distraction!!


baby blue

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