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Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: ___JA] #368501 05/24/09 02:31 AM
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IronFront Offline
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Then why is it "If you have daughters you MUST read this" instead of children? If the age is what you're mad at, is the girl any more at fault than the boy?

Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: IronFront] #368505 05/24/09 03:24 AM
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___JA Offline
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I agree with you, yowo. I think that the topic title should be changed from daughters to children.

Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: ___JA] #368519 05/24/09 06:05 AM
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I thought of that when it was too late to change it, but all that really matters is that people are finding out about this, especially those that have young children or teenagers. In the interview, they were focusing on the fact that it is girls that are putting themselves in harms way, so, I wasn't thinking when I said " if you have daughters..must read." I agree, it should say children, I would change it if I could.


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Re: If you have children MUST READ [Re: Looney Luna] #368526 05/24/09 06:52 AM
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Sort of changed.

Re: If you have children MUST READ [Re: IronFront] #368528 05/24/09 07:14 AM
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I believe it is peer pressure that starts it. I believe our culture has bred sex as a way to get what you need or want(duh) and made it acceptable. Did any one see the news tonight, national.. about the young man who has 21 kids. I think he's still under 21. It just happened he said. If you can't control your self at least use a condom. Oh, that would involve control also. We have become a nation if instant gratification. Self control starts at home.

Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: tweetymom] #368529 05/24/09 07:23 AM
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Tweetymom, all it takes to turn a liberal into a conservative is a baby! I know, happened to me.

Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: tealcandtina] #368534 05/24/09 09:00 AM
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Tealcandtina, you are so right. And I've never felt guilty for that. (the hipocrit part).

I come from a family that one half of them is ultra strict, and the other half is the opposite. I didn't learn anything from either side. But they were seemingly fine, upstanding people who went to church every Sunday and were well-thought of in the community. So I just went along my way, not ever thinking of consequences or disease, because no one told me anything. >the strict didn't speak of it, and the other must not have thought it needed to be said. I didn't know what was happening to me when I started my monthlys at age 11! And I had been doing things (or one thing) for a long time before I found out that that's how babys are made!

I was a strict mother but I spoke to my children early, and I hope it helped them. My daughter says it did. But I also know that eventually, your kids tell you what they want you to know! If you're a single mom, it's hard to know everything going on with them.

I feel that peer pressure is the main thing that most pay attention to, since they spend more time at school than at home for many years. I could be wrong about that. I don't know!!


Last edited by tweetymom; 05/24/09 01:37 PM.

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Rest with Merlin
Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: tweetymom] #368901 05/26/09 10:34 PM
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You know it's amazing to me that it's considered "strict" to be an actual parent to your children. I work with people that are flabergasted because their kids are smoking pot and having sex with adults, yet they ALLOW them to do these things. Their children have no real curfew, no supervision, the parents let them spend the weekends at their "friend's house" (and then are shocked when they find out that their kids didn't really go to their friend's house at all)and never check up on them, they purchase and pay for their cell phones but don't monitor them, they don't know their children's friend's parents at all, they only know their kids grades when they get their report card...

If 'strict' is actually involving yourself in your child's life and also monitoring their actions when they are away from you were living in a sad time.

Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: Draw_me_a_Bunny] #368903 05/26/09 10:46 PM
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yep i was never allowed to just go to someones house, my mom had to know their parents, and the parents ussually understood and appreciatedthis.

i was never aloowed to go "hangout" anywhere, and i used to get so upset that i wasnt allowed to go hnag out at the mall lol ... but my mom was right...it was stupid and there was no reason for a child to be hnaging out at a store hahaha we went to the mall alot but i wasnt dropped off and let to roam around freely, even at 16 and 17 yrs old.

i could go to movies with friends, but i had to show my mom the ticket stub to proove i didnt see anything over pg, sometimes pg13 movies were approved, rated r movies were never ever approved.

i was not allowed to sit in front of the tv either ....i have virtually no memories of watching tv as a kid except the cartoons when i was really little. even as a teen ...i wasnt allowed to vege out at the tv...we did watch tv, as a family!!!

my music was also monitored ... i wasnt allowed to listen to things that were overtly sexual or offensive.

i wasnt allowed to dress like a 'working girl' either ... i dressed my age, i dressed fashionable and decent, always had good new clothes, but not trashy...no short short shorts, no flimsy tanks, no mini skirts...

and no make up !!! i wasnt allowed to wear make up until i was about 17 yrs old !!! i did wear make up LOL just poweder and lip gloss and would wash my face before i went home LOL but i didnt dare wear anything else that that!

and all this made sense... i was not an adult, i was not grown, i was a child, even at 17yrs old i was a child!! i was y parents responsibility and they were the boss. i didnt need to walk around in full make up, cleavage and booty shorts !!!

my mom and dad raised me to love them deeply, and them being disappointed in me was far greater than any punishment they handed down.

when i turned 18 iw as free .. i could do whatever i wanted, wear what i wanted, listen to and watch what i wanted...i was an adult and my own responsibility!!! and my mom knew she had raised me well enough and taught me enough that i was able to handle being a decent, trustworthy, well adjusted adult.

you have to start this from birth. if you start this at 13 your kids will only laugh at you like yea ok mom whatever ... when i see the way some kids today talk to their parents i am shocked...i mean utterly shocked ...

if i spoke to my parents that way id of been knocked acros sthe room and my parents did not get physical with us ever but they would never have tolerated that !!!

Re: If you have daughters MUST READ [Re: ] #368907 05/26/09 11:10 PM
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I know! My parents were the exact same way, they always wanted to meet my friend's parents and see where they lived before I was allowed to go to their house- this just seems like common sense to me.

I though my parents were "strict" growing up but now I realized the blessing they were, there is no rush in growing up, you can never get your childhood back and I'm so happy my parents understood that and allowed me to be a child. They brought me up with morals and a conscious and thank goodness because I am capable of making the right choice today because of them.

Young girls are growing up overly sexualized (perhaps boys too but I can only speak from experience) most girls I went to high school with lost their virginity young, most of my friends didn't, if you surround yourself with the right kind of people then negative peer pressure isn't as hard to overcome. Maybe I was lucky to get out of high school with my virginity and drug-free, but I think it had everything to do with my parents.

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